True Beauty Devotion

This is a quick devotion I put together for my daughters and I to do over breakfast that I adapted from a chapter in the book "Five Conversations You Must Have With Your Daughter" by Vicki Courtney.

1. What does it mean to be beautiful? or What does the world say is beautiful? (I usually ask my youngest first and move up to the oldest.)
2. Read 1 Timothy 4:8
3. What is God's attitude toward physical exercise? Toward godliness?
4. What can we do to be spiritually "healthy"?
5. Which is more important to you, physical health or spiritual health? Why?
6. Talk about exercise for health benefits, staying fit in order to have energy and good health to serve your family and your God!
7. Read 1 Samuel 16:6-7
8. What did God tell Samuel not to look at?
9. By what standard does God judge beauty?
10. Talk about the things we do to make our outer self beautiful vs. the things we do to make our inner selves beautiful.
11. Which do we spend more time on? Why?
12. Read Psalm 139:14
13. Watch Dove Evolution You Tube video and discuss the images the media show us and how they are altered. http://youtu.be/iYhCn0jf46U

Behind, Beside, and Beyond

"It was with good reason God said let the older women teach the younger (Titus 2).

Trial and error is not the best teacher when it comes to marriage and motherhood!"

- Debi Pearl

I agree! I have several "mentor moms" who I call on for wisdom and advice on a fairly regular basis. Women who are ahead of me in this adventure of motherhood. Women whose children are bearing fruit. Women who are like-minded.

I heard it said once that we all need someone who is younger who we are helping along, someone who is ahead of us who helps us, and someone to walk beside us who is in a similar season of life. I think most women are fine in the "alongside" department, but lacking in the other two. Let's not re-invent the wheel, so to speak! Let's learn from each other and avoid some common pitfalls.

Some women ask "how do I find a mentor?" Look around you and find a mom a few steps ahead who is like-minded and is on the road you want to travel and ASK HER! Invite her over for coffee or a lunch date out and pick her brain. Ask if she would be willing to answer some questions for you regarding being a godly wife and mom. I bet she'd be blessed to do it! You may have to meet with a few different ladies before you find a really comfy fit, but it will be worth it! It doesn't have to be anything formal, just a friend you can call on in times of need (and we all have them!)

On the flip-side--are you open to helping someone else? All of us are older than someone! Are you willing to share the wisdom you have gathered thus far?

Two Recipes for Success- Which do you want to make?

Colossians 3:1-4

Living as Those Made Alive in Christ

¹ Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. ² Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. ³ For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. ⁴When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.

Sunday at church we had an amazing sermon that has had me thinking. It really complemented all that God has taught me from the Mother Teresa book. Don't you love when He speaks from all different directions and resources to shape your thinking in an area?

Here is an overview of some of the points my pastor hit me with:

• We are easily distracted. We live in a world with too many distractions.
• Sometimes the "good stuff" we do can get in the way and keep us from God's "best" for us.
• Am I defining my world and my circumstances by Christ and His plan and kingdom or by my own thoughts, feelings, or the world's leading?
• Am I seeking His agenda or my own?
• Which is more important? My Lordship and my plan or His Lordship and His plan?
• Am I choosing to know nothing but Christ and Him crucified (1 Corinthians 2:2) or do I still think I know quite a bit and interject my "wisdom" into all my decisions in spite of what God thinks?
• How am I defining success?
• The world says "what you see is what you get" meaning if you "look" successful on the outside (a good job, stylish clothes, nice car and home, pretty family, financial security...etc.) then you are successful.
• But what does Jesus say about success?
• How is success measured in the kingdom?
• When I stand before God will He be impressed by this outward "success" or is He looking for something entirely different and I have been "duped"?
• What will be important then?

I think of Mother Teresa (since we just finished reading her story) and imagine how pleased the Father must have been with her life's investment. She did not gather up treasures for herself, but gave herself entirely to a mission of loving the unlovable in Jesus name. I compare this to myself. What is my investment? I have known Jesus for 12 years now. I have studied my Bible continuously since He saved me. I have sought ways to share my faith, attended church faithfully, and am raising four children to know and love Him. But I have done all this while remaining in the comfort and safety of my Kentucky home where I live in a gorgeous neighborhood, surrounded by pretty people with plenty to eat and wear. Don't get me wrong, I am not talking about earning my salvation. My salvation is complete and secure in Christ. I am talking about using my life wisely for His glory. Being Jesus hands and feet. Focusing on things above rather than the here and now. It is so easy to get caught up in THIS life and forget that there are those who have yet to hear the gospel and are dying as we speak!

Rusty and I were privileged to hear Dennis Rainey, the founder of Family Life Ministries, speak at an adoption dinner recently and he said something that has really stuck with me. He said that when we are near to something it matters to us and we care, but when we are far away (removed) we lose interest and it is more difficult to care. Basically the old "out of sight, out of mind" mentality. This is exactly why Mother Teresa chose to go and live among the poorest of the poor rather than serving them while living in the convent up on the hill, separate. She wanted to live AMONG the people, eat what they ate, live the way they lived so she would have true compassion for their situation. So as I'm listening to the sermon on Sunday I was thinking...if Rusty and I were on a plane that crashed on a deserted island and we were the only 2 who were un-injured and mobile, we would be up and running, helping the other crash victims. We would do our best to nurse them back to health. It would be a desperate situation that calls for immediate help. Isn't that the truth of the situation we live in today? Around the world there are so many sick, dying, starving, impoverished, orphaned, lost people and here we are able-bodied and equipped with resources to help and yet we have chosen to live separate from the problem. We aren't close enough to see it, to feel it, to have compassion. We have "moved" to the other side of the "island" to our comfy neighborhood and ignored the need hoping "someone else" would help. We make the mistake (or choose to believe) or (allow ourselves to be deceived) of thinking that we don't have what it takes to make a difference. We (want to) think it takes lots of money or special gifts and talents we don't posses. I think this is what God showed me in MT life, she was an ordinary woman with no money, no resources, and no outward "gifting" to set her apart and yet she made a dramatic difference in our world for the sake of Christ. And she did it in a completely unconventional way! No spreadsheets, no goal-setting, no self-promotion, no fancy fund-raising, no catchy slogans or ministry titles, no cross country speaking tour, no ten year plan, no expensive or elaborate building plans or programs. She simply followed God to position herself in a place of need and then set about meeting those needs in a simple, loving way every day. She drew near to the problem no one else wanted to be close to. That is courage. That is love. That is the gospel!

Mother Teresa didn't have the worlds definition of "success", but I feel sure she was a true success in the eyes of our Lord. The question is which version are you striving for?

Colossians 3:1-4 (The Message)

He Is Your Life

^1-2 So if you're serious about living this new resurrection life with Christ, act like it. Pursue the things over which Christ presides. Don't shuffle along, eyes to the ground, absorbed with the things right in front of you. Look up, and be alert to what is going on around Christ—that's where the action is. See things from his perspective.^-4Your old life is dead. Your new life, which is your real life—even though invisible to spectators—is with Christ in God. He is your life. When Christ (your real life, remember) shows up again on this earth, you'll show up, too—the real you, the glorious you. Meanwhile, be content with obscurity, like Christ.

A Real Nice Gal

We have been studying India in History and just finished reading this book about Mother Teresa. Sadly, I knew almost nothing about this incredible woman prior to this. I knew she was a nun who worked with the poor and that was about it. After reading the book and watching a documentary on her life I am convinced she is the clearest, most beautiful example of humility (other than Jesus) that I have ever heard about.

Humility is such a difficult quality to define, and even more difficult to achieve. Websters defines it as:

1. (n.) The state or quality of being humble; freedom from pride and arrogance; lowliness of mind; a modest estimate of one's own worth; a sense of one's own unworthiness

2. (n.) An act of submission or courtesy. Low in rank or status-"a humble position"

My favorite definition, in fact the only one that has ever been helpful to me, is:

"True humility is not thinking less of myself, but instead, thinking of myself less." C.S. Lewis

Mother Teresa chose to become a nun and lived in the convent for many years teaching in a school on the same grounds in India until one day the Lord called her to give it all up to serve the poorest of the poor on the streets of Calcutta. What I love about this book is that it tells us she was normal. Her first experience with these "untouchables" was in a hospital where an infants foot had been nearly chewed off by a rat. The baby was too undernourished to cry out for help. This case and others like it scared and disgusted her and she vowed she would return to the convent and never come out to the streets again! But soon she sensed God reminding her of the passage from Matthew 25

⁴² For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, ⁴³ I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’

⁴⁴ “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’

⁴⁵ “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’

What I love about this is the acknowledgment that she was a normal human being as opposed to some unique, one-of-a-kind super-human! Was she special and unique? Oh yes! But was she "special" in some sense that you or I couldn't do the same thing when filled and submitted to the power of Christ? No! She felt the same disgust that any of us would feel in that same circumstance. The difference is, she allowed God to change her, to grow her into a woman who looked past the outer and loved the people in spite of their sickness, their smell, their imperfections.

Because, many times, I think we decide that people like Mother Teresa are "different" than we are and that's why they are able to do these awesome works for God. We make excuses..."well if I had___.", or "if I was ___.", as though there is something fundamentally different in her biological makeup that enables her to do hard work and love it and we just don't have that "special something".

We don't just do it on the BIG scale though, we do it in the smaller areas too. Like marriage, we say "I know the Bible says I should submit to my husbands leadership and I would BUT..." Then we explain why Sally can do it because her husband is the pastor and he is a great Godly man and "if I was married to him..." We say it about weight loss and physical fitness. We see a star lose weight and we say "sure, I could do that too if I had a personal trainer and a chef!" Really? Does that make it easier not to eat the brownies at midnight? Do they sleep with you and hold you down? Mother Teresa compared herself to a "pencil in the hand of God". Let's just admit that God would be pleased to do equally amazing work through you or I if we were but willing to surrender to the same degree. Ouch.

In addition to her humility, which was so beautiful to see in action, here are some other points I learned from her life:

• God doesn't force us into His service kicking and screaming. He allows us to be involved and if we will obey we will find ourselves LOVING it! He always blesses our sacrifice. She didn't tolerate this work, she lived for it!
• She did not set out to cure the worlds poverty problem or build some kind of ministry empire. She simply saw a need and began to meet it one day at a time.
• She did not make long term plans or goals. She did the work that was in front of her today. When she saw a new need she began to move in the direction to meet it too. She didn't know how or when it would happen, she just moved in faith that God would supply.
• What she was doing seemed like foolishness to many.
• She didn't have money and that was never a concern for her.
• She drew near to the people she wanted to serve. She chose to become an Indian citizen, she lived where they lived, how they lived, dressed as they dressed, ate as they ate.
• She didn't "recruit" helpers or supporters in an active way, she was too busy doing the work itself. She trusted God to handle all the details.
• She worked hard! She slept 2-3 hours per night and prayed 2 hours each morning.
• When she had a need she went directly to her knees. She never tried to handle things herself, she depended on the Lord.

After we completed the book we watched a documentary on Mother Teresa's life on Netflix. When it was over my youngest daughter Carley, age 5, said to me "she was a real nice girl huh mom?" This cracked me up since Mother always looked like she was a hundred and twelve years old and she was so much more than nice!! Hilarious!

A man can counterfeit love, he can counterfeit faith, he can counterfeit hope and all the other graces, but it is very difficult to counterfeit humility. --D. L. Moody

How do we know if we have a servant’s heart? By how we act when we are treated like one! Unknown

Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace, a soul generated by love. --Martin Luther King, Jr.

A free invitation card by Smilebox

We are super excited because all 3 girls will be singing in the choir for this performance and Morgan even has a speaking part!! This is her first time to participate in a play so we are looking forward to seeing how things turn out!!

Fun Books

So I usually don't read books for "fun", I typically read books to learn, but I've been on a break to just enjoy some lighter reading. Plus I am trying not to buy any books but borrow them instead from the library. Where have I been that I didn't know I could get just about any book (older than one year old) from the library even if my branch doesn't carry it? I can request it online and they email me when it is waiting for me at my branch! What a deal! So here's a few I've just finished:

All really quick reads, all very inspirational and interesting. I'm a little hesitant to admit the Kirk Cameron one, but it's not because of his teen idol status (promise), but because of his involvement in the Way of the Master ministry that drew my attention. :)

I may be back...

I don't want to make any promises I can't keep...

but I'm going to try to get back in the swing of the BLOG!

The world went blurry for a while after we got home with Evan, but that isn't unusual. :) Rusty and I had a discussion about how it takes us about a year to "settle in" when we add a new family member! But we sat down in March (our one year mark) and decided we were ready for a new "adventure", so we'll see what the good Lord has in store for us next! In the mean time, I know it will do me good to have an outlet for my "talk".

So I made some cosmetic changes to the blog, changed the ages of the kids...etc. and now I feel REFRESHED! So, what do you want to talk about? Marriage, parenting, cooking, crafts, God-stories and lessons???

Our 2011 Ten Day Prayer Kickoff!

I found a short article in a magazine that listed ten different prayer "postures" found in the Bible and we (my 11 year old daughter and I) are going to use it to kick off the new year in prayer!

January 1, 2011 Kneeling 1 Kings 8:54

January 2, 2011 Standing Jeremiah 18:20

January 3, 2011 Sitting 2 Samuel 7:18

January 4, 2011 In Bed Psalm 63:6

January 5, 2011 In Private Matthew 6:6

January 6, 2011 With Others Psalm 35:18

January 7, 2011 Hands Lifted 1 Timothy 2:8

January 8, 2011 Silently 1 Samuel 1:13

January 9, 2011 Aloud Acts 16:25

January 10, 2011 At All Times Luke 18:1

The more we learn about prayer, the more we will think about prayer, the more we will think about our Savior and talk with Him and the better we will know Him and love Him. I want to begin the year pointed at Him in prayer!

We will be recording this in our prayer journals so we can discuss what we are learning. Here is the format (just to give my daughter something to follow):

• Date
• Scripture written out
• Two things I prayed about
• My thoughts (3+ sentences)

Puppies and Toddlers

Maybe you've never noticed how much puppies and toddlers have in common? I think of it often as I parent my 4th toddler. Let's look at some of the similarities...

1. Both respond to simple, clear commands along with tone and facial expression.

When an owner speaks to his pet his language is simple and straightforward. He doesn't speak in long, monotonous speeches because he knows the limitations of the one he speaks to. He is short and to the point - "sit", "come", "lay down". The owner doesn't spend time explaining why or apologizing for asking because he views himself as "in charge" and expects obedience from his pet. The pet is able to "read" the owners mood by his tone and facial expression. He knows if it is play time or time to relax. The same is true of toddlers. They respond best to simple language like "no touch", "come to Mommy", "sit down", "kiss", and they are able to read our mood too. The Bible says

James 5:12 But above all, my brothers, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or by any other oath, but let your "yes" be yes and your "no" be no, so that you may not fall under condemnation.

This is an important principle and one I am reminded of almost daily as I parent. We must say what we mean and mean what we say. Remember the KISS idea? Keep It Simple Stupid. What a great parenting mantra! There's really no need to do a full explanation of why I said "no" when you touched the ornaments on the Christmas tree, your just not allowed to touch them-period-cause I'm the Mom. :) I observe a lot of parents doing a lot of "discussing/explaining/lecturing" with toddlers and find it amusing when a simple "no" will work so much better.

2. Both require clear, consistent boundaries.

When you bring home a new puppy many of the training books will warn you not to let the puppy chew on household items like old socks. The reason is because they do not know the difference between "old socks" and your brand new socks! Then your mad because Fido has eaten every sock in the house! We have found the same principle to be true when training toddlers. All remote controls are off limits, all cell phones are "no-no", no papers, newspapers or books are allowed to be torn or crumpled because we know that little sweet-pea doesn't know the difference between a magazine we've already read and don't care about and the one that is important for Daddy's work. We know that although we may not mind if Jr. tears up our remote, that we may come over to your house and you won't ever invite us back when he tears up yours! The great thing about toddlers and puppies is that these things can be taught in just a few days with clear, consistent boundaries!

3. Both respond to positive feedback.

Puppies and toddlers both really enjoy pleasing their Mom and Dad! Again, they read our tone and facial expression and they know when we are happy and excited. We are teaching Evan to blow kisses right now and every time he does we all erupt in clapping, cheers and laughter! He knows that this is for him, that he did the right thing and he joins in the celebration. It won't take too many training sessions like that to teach him to blow kisses!

4. Both are smart and capable.

Our friends have laughed at us for a long time because each of our children have been trained to stay on the large area rug we have in our family room. From the time they become mobile we have said "stay on the rug" and picked them up and put them back on the rug until they learned that this was their play area. This is great for safety. I know what is within their reach while they are on the rug. There are no small pieces or parts, and they can't fall up or down stairs as long as they remain on the rug. We don't have to search the house to find them if we walk in to answer the phone. I know where they are and that they are safe. When my son began to walk recently many people have commented "I bet your chasing him all over!", I just smile and say "no, it's not that bad." Another benefit to this training is when we are away from home. My in-laws also have an area rug in their family room and our son stays right there in the room with us without wandering off into other parts of the house (into the dogs dishes...etc.). Many people are shocked when they discover this "skill" in our 15 month old which makes me laugh--do we really believe that we can train our dogs and not our children?? Our children are much smarter and more capable than our pets!!

5. Both desire security and leadership.

Toddlers and puppies are happier and more secure when they have discipline, boundaries, and strong leadership. They want to know that we know what we are doing and are confident in our decisions. When we are sure, they feel sure. When we wishy-wash around with a hundred words in an un-clear tone they don't know what to do. When we yell about something today and ignore it tomorrow they are confused and insecure. When we live by a flexible schedule and the rules stay the same, when our moods are predictable and stable, they are relaxed and happy. I had a boss once who said the number one quality he looked for in an employee was stability. He didn't want to deal with any Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde types where your not sure who your going to get today. Predictability was key to him. I think he had a good point.

I Understand Deception

I know a young woman with small children in the midst of a divorce right now. She is leaving her faithful, hard-working, honest, good-looking, kind, wonderful father, husband for another man after having a long-term affair with him. Her children are hurt and confused, her husband is destroyed, her parents are devastated, his parents are crushed, and their friends are shocked. This is a woman raised in a Christian home with happily married parents. She met her new boyfriend in the church choir.

Deceive = to cause to accept as true or valid what is false or invalid, to give a false impression.

When I heard about the situation my first thought was "so this is deception". How else can you explain a woman who is happy in her marriage one day and out "dating" another man the next? This is deception as plain as the serpent in the garden. In the same way the enemy caused Eve to believe she would be "happier" and MORE fulfilled if she ate the ONE fruit she couldn't eat, he caused this young woman to believe that somehow the grass would be greener in this other mans' arms. Eve never considered the consequences of her actions in her own life, or those generations to follow and I'm sure this woman hasn't either. That is one of the enemies specialties...to focus all our attention on the object of desire and leave no time or thought to it's ramifications. Let us never forget that the devils' intention is to STEAL, KILL, and DESTROY. What is more destructive in this world than divorce?

Deceive = to lead astray, imposing a false idea or belief that causes ignorance, bewilderment, or helplessness

Watching this situation progress to divorce has been painful for all involved. Many friends and family have tried to talk with this woman and reveal the consequences of her actions but to no avail. Too many times these situations remain hidden until the deception is so thick that it is nearly impossible to recover the victim. Too many times we, as onlookers, make excuses, rationalize the situation, or ignore it saying "that's none of my business" (which is another deception!). This is as dangerous as a burning building and we must be willing to rescue!

Deceive = to obscure the truth

If you are a follower of Christ and you know the TRUTH, don't keep it to yourself! I think we need to learn the art of "speaking the truth in love" (Ephesians 4:15). The Bible says the TRUTH will set us free. Sometimes that TRUTH is a good, happy message, like the gospel. But other times that TRUTH is hard, painful, and awkward to deliver, and yet it is still the key to freedom.

I have a friend who started a new job and has found herself in the middle of a potential adulteress situation between her boss and a new-hire (both married). There is quite a bit of flirting going on and it is uncomfortable for all the employees. I advised my friend to talk with the female from a point of view of concern. We have all been "blinded" in a situation in our lives where those on the "outside" could see things much more clearly than we could. Right now is the time to "nip this thing in the bud" but who can do that? My friend says "I don't have that kind of relationship with her!" Yes but the only people who DO have that kind of relationship with her will not know about this situation until it is much too late!! God placed YOU there at this time to speak the truth to her in love. She may not respond well to it. She may continue in the relationship. At least the truth has been spoken to her, an attempt to snap her out of the deceptive "trance".

Matthew 24:4

Jesus answered: “Watch out that no one deceives you."

This story and others like it should serve as a warning to all of us that deception is real, effective, and we all are at risk. What kind of safeguards do you have in place to guard against this in your marriage? What boundaries will you implement today? Do you have an accountability partner who can ask you about these? Remember, the first deception is when we think "that would never happen to me".

James 1:22
Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.

One of the ways we guard against deception is by filling up on TRUTH daily in God's Word. Knowing the TRUTH is the greatest defense against the devils' schemes. Not just "knowing" Bible facts as though we want to win a prize on a quiz show, but KNOWING the ONE who is the Way and the TRUTH and the LIFE and doing what He says in obedience and out of love for Him.

Miserable in Paradise

I sat with a friend who is in horrible pain recently. She and her husband have been trying to conceive for a year now and have suffered the loss of miscarriage as well. She loves the Lord and is seeking to follow Him. She is happily married, lives in a beautiful home, and they have a healthy, happy daughter and wish to grow their family. Basically all is well in her life except this situation. It all seems so simple. Why wouldn't God want to give them another child? In her eyes, and in mine, it seems perfectly logical and even beneficial to all involved. Yet God is not following her plan or mine. In the mean time, my friend is miserable. Everywhere she turns she finds pregnant women. Worse yet, pregnant women who complain about being pregnant! Day after day there are continuous reminders that she is not pregnant and month after month the days drag on until there is a new opportunity. It is all-consuming and heart-breaking.

After my meeting with her I began to reflect in prayer on her situation with the Lord and He reminded me of a similar situation from Scripture. The first book of the Bible tells us about another young woman who "had it all" and yet there was one thing she couldn't get her mind off of.

Genesis 2:16-17 ¹⁶ And the LORD God commanded the man, "You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; ¹⁷but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die."

Adam and Eve were living in paradise and had freedom to eat from any tree in the garden except one. What did Satan do? He caused Eve to focus on the one thing she didn't have and it ended in her destruction!

How can you be miserable when you live in paradise?

Listen to the voice of the deceiver, the father of lies, the accuser, that's how!

How much of your thought time is spent on "the one tree you can't eat from"? How does it impact your mood, your effectiveness, your perspective?

The enemy wants our focus to be on ourselves and our plan because he knows that we are weak and fallen and will always come up short resulting in disappointment, depression, even hopelessness. Here is a "thought recipe for disaster"...

• Thoughts focused on what I want, need and desire rather than on what God wants, what He thinks and what He desires. Do we really believe our way is better?
• Thoughts that compare me to someone else. Either I come out ahead and puff up with pride, or I come out inferior and feel like a loser. No good can come from comparisons.
• Obsessive thoughts that include mental ultimatums like "when _____ happens, then I can be happy/content/useful...etc."

The enemy wants you and I to believe that our happiness is dependent on a circumstance, an event, or an outcome. If you are a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ you have reason to be JOY-FILLED every day! God's plan is for you and I to choose to focus on HIM today, what He has done, what He is doing, and who He is. When we purposefully shift our focus off ourselves and onto God and others we will have a different outlook and outcome! How can we do that? I always say "what does that look like in real life?" Here are some practical examples of things to do to get your mind off YOU...

• Get your prayer list from Sunday school and pray for those needs.
• Call to check on a friend and pray with them over the phone.
• Bake cookies and take them to someone.
• Do something special for your spouse. What would thrill him? Clean out the closet, wash the car, pay the bills?
• Praise God for who He is. Go through the ABC's thinking of an attribute of God for each one (awesome, bold, complete...etc.)
• Make a blessing list of all the things you are thankful for.
• Use your gifts to serve someone. Are you gifted in organization? Call your friend who isn't and offer to come by and work for an hour. Are you a great cook? Invite some newlywed gals over for a cooking class!

All of these suggestions are replacements. The Bible talks about "taking off" certain behaviors and "putting on" others. So when you find yourself thinking about that one area of your life that is less than "ideal" you replace that line of thinking with one of these ideas. When you are tempted to call a friend to complain that your situation hasn't improved, instead pray with them about a concern of theirs. It is never enough to vow to STOP something, we must always be ready to START a new way of doing things to replace the old.

I love my "Comforts of the Cross" devotional by Elyse Fitzpatrick. In it she challenges me to focus more on God's love for me rather than my love for Him, more on His obedience than mine, more on His faithfulness than mine, more on His strengths than mine. "I must focus on how I've been loved, irrevocably, eternally, freely, without merit, and rest in the awareness of my perfect acceptance before Him."

As long as we are looking at ourselves we will remain disappointed. We are imperfect and the proof is obvious and plentiful. But thoughts of Jesus will never leave us disappointed, only grateful and amazed. It's up to you.

We've Never Prayed For Our Breakfast

^{Phillipians 4:19}

And my God will meet all your needs

according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

I read a book to the kids recently called "Granny Han's Breakfast". It was the story of a missionary lady in Taiwan who literally had no food in her cupboards for breakfast one morning. The young girl who helped her around the house asked her what she was going to do. Granny Han said she would pray and ask God to meet her need. This girl was not a believer and thought she was foolish for considering this a reasonable plan of action. Over the next hour she saw God meet Granny Han's need as friends and neighbors stopped by "out of the blue" with fruit, coffee, and other treats. Granny Han rejoiced as her young friend watched in disbelief.

Have you ever prayed for your breakfast? Lunch? Dinner? Neither have I. The girls and I discussed how Granny's faith must have been enriched by this experience. How she must have felt so loved and cared for by her Father God. How seeing this must have impacted her house guest. It's almost sad that we haven't had such an experience.

What kinds of needs do we have and how do we meet them? This morning my skin felt dry, I went to the bathroom cabinet and got my lotion and took care of it. If I hadn't had any lotion in the cabinet I would have hopped in the van and driven to CVS and bought some. When I am hungry I get in my pantry, or stop by the grocery, or even go to a restaurant...I don't even have to go in!! I can drive-thru a window and pick something up! If I am in pain, I call the Doctor and he will write me a prescription. If someone is looking for love, they can get on an internet dating sight or go to a club. If we need spiritual advice, we can call a pastor, or attend one of a thousand churches on every corner of this city! We barely look to God even in spiritual matters any more!! We, as a society, have done (and continue to do) our best to meet every single need we have on our own. We have squeezed God out of our lives. Only in desperate circumstances (those we don't think we can control on our own) do we call on Him anymore. Jesus said He would never leave us and never forsake us--but have we left and forsaken Him?

What do we miss in living this way? The opportunity to see His love and personal care for us. The chance for our faith to be built and strengthened. The occasion to bring glory to His Name and His Kingdom. The truth is that most of us spend an awful lot of time daydreaming (or complaining) about how our lives should/could be easier when the reality is that they are already TOO EASY and that is a big chunk of our problem!

God brought this to my attention back in July when our family went on vacation. We stayed in a wonderful place on the beach with a pool and room service and had a great time. Guess what? I hardly opened my Bible and spent almost zippo time in prayer. Why? Good question since the excuse I would use at home would be "time" or lack of. I had nothing but time on vacation; and even some time alone when I would go upstairs for Evan to take his nap. But all was well. Everything was running smooth. Everyone was healthy and happy and all our needs were met. This was an eye-opening experience for me.

I love the song "In Christ Alone" that says:

In Christ alone I place my trust

and find my glory in the power of the cross

in every victory let it be said of me

my source of strength, my source of hope

is Christ alone.

Let us also never forget that our greatest need in this life is to be rescued from the judgment we deserve for our rebellion against the One, True, Living God. And that need can only be met by one, our Savior Jesus Christ. So no matter how self-sufficient we may feel, it is only an illusion when we get to the core of what really matters which is "where will you spend eternity?".

My Workplace

So I'm reading Charlotte's Web to the girls as part of Paige's first grade curriculum, and it is really good! I had forgotten, since I was probably her age the last time I read it and I haven't seen the updated movie.

In Chapter 9 Charlotte (the wise spider) is explaining to Wilbur (the young, naive pig) why he can't spin a web like she does. She tells him this is a talent unique to spiders and that even men cannot build a web, though they will try. Charlotte tells him about a bridge that men have built that is similar to a spiders web.

Wilbur: "What do people catch in the Queensborough Bridge--bugs?"

Charlotte: "No, they don't catch anything. They just keep trotting back and forth across the bridge thinking there is something better on the other side. If they'd hang head-down at the top of the thing and wait quietly, maybe something good would come along. But no--with men it's rush, rush, rush, every minute. I'm glad I'm a sedentary spider."

Wilbur: "What does sedentary mean?"

Charlotte: "Means I sit still a good part of the time and don't go wandering all over creation. I know a good thing when I see it, and my web is a good thing. I stay put and wait for what comes. Gives me a chance to think."

I know my girls think I am nuts when, in the middle of the story, I have to run to find a highlighter, a bookmark, a post-it--something to mark this AWESOME epiphany moment!! But this conversation between Charlotte and Wilbur fit so beautifully with the previous blog about "My Job"!

These statements are so simple and yet so accurate in todays society.

• We DO trot back and forth always thinking there is something better that we are missing out on!
• We rarely "hang" and wait quietly to see what the Lord would say or bring our way.
• We are rushing constantly which causes us to be short-tempered and stressed out!
• We DO wander all over creation seeking fulfillment, praise, significance.
• We DON'T know a good thing when we see it!

Charlotte's web is her home and she sees it as a "good thing" and she "stays put". My home is my workplace and God has called me to make it a haven for my family. A place where we can relax, learn, have fun, eat together, and show hospitality to others. I need not go elsewhere to find meaning, there is meaning at home where I love my family, teach, train, correct, cook, clean, raise my children to know Jesus, love my husband, and visit with friends.

I think I'm going to adopts Charlotte's philosophy on life--"never hurry and never worry!" If you are not "catching anything" then maybe you should take some time to be sedentary like Psalm 46:10.

My sweet Evan boy!

!

My Job

I know a lady who works at Macy's. She hates it when customers take a load of clothes into the dressing room and then leave all of them in there in a heap when they leave the store. She then has to spend a large portion of her day in the dressing room hanging and re-stocking the clothes. My thought is "that's your job!". I mean, isn't that what they pay you for? I understand people are inconsiderate and should be more responsible for cleaning up after themselves, but...this is why they pay her, to hang up and put away the clothes! So when she goes to work-who cares what she does-just stay busy, work hard at whatever needs to be done, and collect your paycheck without complaint.

This is what God brought to my mind this morning as I was complaining in prayer to Him about all the interruptions and corrections I have been dealing with from the kids. We homeschool and as I am trying to teach one child, the other comes over and needs help with something else or needs to be corrected for disobedience...etc. It can be very frustrating to manage the needs and misbehaviors of all 4. I find myself agitated at the "inconvenience" of stopping one lesson/conversation to deal with another. So as I talked to the Lord about my irritation and asked for His help, he brought this lady to mind and made the obvious correlation..."Cristie--that is your JOB!" "You are the Mom and it is your job to help them, to teach them, to correct them and to train them-all day, every day!"

Why am I so surprised that they have to be told something over and over again when I continue to make many of the same mistakes over and over again in spite of the correction God has given me? Why am I acting like I have "other things to do" when being a Mom is my JOB, my #1 priority, my PRIVILEGE! Sometimes I need a change in perspective to get back on track. Just the reminder that this is MY JOB will change the way I view the daily "irritations". I can choose to see them as "training opportunities" instead and be thankful that I am around to witness them and equipped by God to deal with them. After all, what could be more important?

Job 12:13

To God belong wisdom and power; counsel and understanding are his.

The things that stick.

When we sat down to dinner tonight Rusty began to tell about a famous coach, John Wooden, who died on Friday at the age of 99. He told the girls "I hope you have a marriage like the one I heard about today". John Wooden was married to his sweetheart Nell for 53 years. She was the only girl he ever kissed. She died 24 years ago on the 21st of March. Since then, every month on the 21st he has written her a love letter. Rusty told the girls that Wooden said he never considered marrying again because he could never love anyone the way he loved Nell.http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=5249532

We talked about faithfulness--what does it mean to be faithful? Why does God want us to be faithful? We explained how the Lord Jesus is faithful, that once we ask Him to be our Lord and Savior that He remains faithful to us to the end. He doesn't change His mind. He doesn't fall in and out of love with us like the old game "He loves me, He loves me not" based on our behavior or performance. He makes a commitment to us, adopts us into His family, and remains committed for all eternity. God wants us to be faithful because He is faithful and He wants us to be like Him.

With tears in his eyes my husband shared with the girls Wooden's final wish was that someone would shave him so he would look nice when he saw Nell. I truly believe this is one of those family moments that will stick in my daughters minds for all time. I believe as they consider a spouse they will recall the conversation their dad had with them on June 8, 2010 and attempt to discern if this man is one who will be faithful to the end.

"Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are," John Wooden

"Clean your room!" and other misunderstood instructions

Recently a mother was visiting our house when I asked my 3 daughters to go upstairs and fold a load of laundry. After they left the room she commented "I wish my kids would help out around the house!" She went on to say that when she told her son to "clean his room" she would find him 20 minutes later in his room playing. The best outcome she could expect was for him to pick up the floor and stuff all the items under the bed, in the closet, or in drawers with no order whatsoever.

Here's what I have learned about this dilemma:

1. Kids do not understand broad concepts like "clean your room" (especially kids under 7). They do understand specific instructions like "put the Barbies in the blue bin". Another broad instruction mothers love to give their kids is "be good". Really? What does that look like? We must be more specific with our expectations when we have small children. Speak real directions that are meaningful in their kid-mind.

2. Flowing from #1...do their things have a "home" where they belong? If you tell your child to "put away the Barbies" do they know where the Barbies are supposed to go? If not, you are making "clean up" very difficult for your child. When their toys have "homes" they are much more likely to be willing and able to put them away. This doesn't have to be some HGTV play room makeover where each bin is labeled and embroidered, it just has to be a system known to the child and taught (and followed) by Mom and Dad.

3. Which brings us to #3...work as a team, especially in the beginning. Everyone likes to be part of a team, to laugh and have fun makes the work go by faster! Rather than sending each family member to a separate room to clean/straighten up, why not move as a team from room to room? This also gives each member an opportunity to "serve" the others! Turn on some music and have fun! Working together gives Mom and Dad the chance to show how the work should be done, to offer tips and guidance, and just build relationship too! Too many times we just bark out orders when it would be much more effective and efficient to say "let's go clean up your room" or "let's get this kitchen cleaned up together--why don't we set the timer for 15 minutes and see if we can beat the clock!!" I believe that kids want to spend time with their parents, especially one on one, so take advantage of that and be productive too!

Taking a break from radio

This Sunday, June 13, will be the final episode of the Contagious radio program on WJMM fm. After much consideration I have decided to stop recording for this "season" of life. I know I have to have an outlet, a way to express myself, so I will be writing more on the blog, as time allows, to share what God is teaching me. The three and a half years of radio programs will continue to be available for download on the website www.contagiousonline.com

Carley's Kiss

May 2010

Airplane photos! We flew on Emirates Airlines and were very happy with them. We flew Cincinnati to JFK in New York then on to Dubai where we stayed overnight in a hotel (which would have been nice if I could have slept!!). My schedule went off kilter starting on Wednesday night before we left on Thursday. I guess I was a little anxious about traveling around the world and meeting my new son for the first time--imagine that! Mostly I was apprehensive about the thought of a 14 hour flight! What does one do for 14 hours in the air?? The Emirates planes have tv's on the back of each seat so you can watch tv, movies, or play video games which is a great feature! Unfortunately I got sick on the big flight, I think it was just motion sickness but sick nonetheless. Don't feel bad for me, feel bad for the elderly Indian woman who sat on the aisle (she spoke no English) and I climbed over her every 30 minutes throughout the majority of the flight! I made friends with all the flight attendants and had the privilege of sitting in the jump seat for large chunks of time as I waited for the restroom to open up. Other than the nausea and vomiting, it was a smooth trip. :)